To Growth in 2019- Things We Must Leave Behind

Take a look through your communications thus far.

Do a deep analysis . The ones we have conversations with shape us in unimaginable ways. We do have to make sure they are of positive impact.

Do the bulk of your communications contribute to growth? Do you find that you don’t have enough time to work on what is important to you?

You might want to take a deep breath, take a glass of red grape juice ( because alcohol is bad for your liver and health in general) and face the arduous task of pruning your conversations.

If all you do is

-Talk about other people’s private business,

– Fight over flimsy things,

– Discuss inappropriate topics you wouldn’t in real life,

– Engage in heated dead-end arguments on incendiary topics like politics or religion,

– Struggle to explain yourself, or feel belittled,

– Be wilfully ignorant, a mansplainer, disrespectful, insensitive or vulgar,

– Spend long hours on meandering conversations with no end or purpose in sight,

You should consider cutting back- a lot – on this conversation/person. There’s way too much toxicity in there. You do not have to be rude. Of course try and work with them to improve things but if they aren’t willing or ready to change, then it’s time to let them go. Appreciate whatever good they’ve brought and send them off on their way with a basket of smiles for flowers.

Cultivate friends and conversations that

– Are about giving back to society.

– Grow you and make you better,

– Inspire you to do things you never thought possible.

– Help you fine-tune your ideas and execute your plans

– Are about exchanging rich, illuminating articles about a wide range of relevant topics.

– Celebrate your accomplishments, are comfortable when your intellect shines forth with almost-blinding radiance,

– Make you laugh with rich humour,

– Expand your horizon, feel your brain literally open up and absorb knowledge,

– Make you feel happy, respected and confident.

Look for these people. Have conversations with them instead.

Be that person.

Because we have to keep being better versions of ourselves, we are done with things or people that prevent us from achieving this. You are too special to be bound to things that diminish you!

That’s the energy we are taking into 2019.

Danke meine damen und herren!

P.S. I think you should read this amazing Medium article by The Startup . It is an easy-to-follow bite-sized guide to growth in 2019 by saying the word ‘No’.

No, you did not read that wrong.

Fun fact: My friend sent it to me. It is the latest in a string of the gazillion cerebral boosts our conversations are made of.

Get a friend like mine.

…………

Wih Love,

Oumissa

About The Cartographer of Memory

Title: The Cartographers of Memory
Author: Boluwatife Afolabi
Publisher: SankofaMag
Year: 2017
Source: @thereadclub ( they have something exciting coming up)

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An anthology of poems that confronts the horrid things we do to ourselves and others. Main themes are love, grief and violence. Despite the best efforts of my English teachers, I am still not good at understanding poetry and I had to read some of them twice.

This form of writing is unique in that the writer can portray their imagination in real and abstract illustration but can still manage to bring relevant truths to light. It however demands discerning thought on the part of the reader.

This picture takes me back to the time I spent with two kind souls @ghaniyah_adetayo and Barakah. They spoilt me with food, treats and more when i needed it the most and gave me some of the best moments this year. Thank you both very much. May Allah grant you the very best of what you seek. They provided the props.

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I am not a chef by any standard but when a recipe pops into my mind ,I will make some art with it. ( May spare a bite or two for you if I am in a generous mood.)

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This spaghetti, dodo(fried plantain) and pepper sauce was packed for office lunch. Believe me, it was delightfully tasty. There has to be a natural band around my stomach that prevents me from eating large portions. I like to think this keeps me in better health. Some of my less kind friends call me a chicken as a result. May Allah forgive them. I still love them though.

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Have you read this book?
What are your thoughts about poetry? Any particular works that have shaped you?
What do you like to include in your book photos? Stationery, food,coffee, marbletops, nature?
Looking forward to your replies.

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Oumissa
Lagos, Nigeria
Thur, 21 Dec 2017

TheRamadhanBaby #20 – Love and Peace

Infuse love into your every word, thought, action.

Never stop working towards peace.

Love Allah by worshipping Him to the best of your ability. Doing what He Loves, loving for His sake Only, giving to His Cause ( Q2:165,177)

Love the Prophet by following his beautiful example.

Love the companions and the pious predecessors by emulating their good deeds and character.

Love your parents by striving to alway make the happy.

Love your siblings, cousins and other relatives including in-laws by being gentle towards them.

“None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.”

(Sahih Bukhari and Muslim)

Love your spouses in mercy and tranquility. (Q30:21)

Love your children for they are the coolness of your eyes, your future and your legacy.

Love one another. (Q10:62)

Love your neighbours by guarding their property and being kind and courteous. (Sahih Muslim)

Love your friends by being there for them.

Love strangers by being concerned and helping, by sending funds, materials , messages and prayers to those affected by war, famine, disease and disaster around the world. By respecting them irrespective of your differences.(Q49:13)

Be a mediator. 

Support peaceful causes. 

Create safe spaces and not scary ones. 

Because love and peace go together, there is no development and progress without these two.

Remember, our Lord is Al-Wadud (The Loving), As-Salam (The Source of Peace).